I’ve been feeling really down and shitty lately (I mean, depressed, extremely sad, alternating between catatonic and crying, eating or not eating and insomnia). My job is the reason and I know I should just quit because I don’t want to become sick again. I’m close to relapsing, I’m aware of it. This job is slowly poisoning me but I hate the idea of quitting. Plus, I don’t know my limit and tend to push myself until I snap. So there’s that too.
My dad is worried (I’ve downplayed this to everyone else in my life) and I’ve made an appointment with my therapist next week. But I work the next five days and I’m freaked out, wondering if I can emotionally handle it. But I will. Since my dad is so worried, he dragged me out of the house (figuratively) and we went to a cafe for cappuccinos.
I feel a little better. But that’s going to have to be enough for now.
Honeysuckle Haiku 